Or "The Dow is down 312.9 points today due to geo-political tension in the Middle East", etc.

Reminds me of Aswath Damodaran´s china bit: "When in doubt, use China. It´s gonna make you look smart while saying absolutely nothing"

The absolute confidence with which people provide post-hoc explanations is great. Often the data is available for those explanations before the market behaviour and with $10k you could make $500k on SPY but everyone can explain after the fact but no one can predict.

Absolute cock and bull nonsense.

What is funny is when you see CNBC change the headline/narrative when the market suddenly moves in the opposite direction.

Stock drops 2% at open:

"Markets are falling because tariffs are 100% bearish signal. Sell it all!"

Stock rebounds 2% a minute later:

"Markets are up because tariffs can't stop the American economy."